a stranger in her own country.
Some days, you are just the odd man out. Period. There really isn’t any other way to put it but bingo, you are out. I think the challenge of that comes as situations continually change, and places where I was at one time in I am now in the out. How do you explain that to someone? I think it is a situation of (when asked, I certainly do not need anymore drama) just calling what is, is.
Someone who I greatly respect has encouraged me to just stand back, be objective and just call it like I see it. It isn’t attempting to place blame, make folks defensive, or asking them to justify their said; it is merely an observation of your present circumstances.
I think the challenge in this comes after taking an objective look and realizing, in fact, through shifting currents that in fact you have become a stranger in the midst of something that is ohh so familiar. Rightly, there is a loss in this. I do think that it is right to see that there is a sadness that comes more from realizing how things have changed, but the loss that accompanies a changed landscape.
Further, there are times when you do something for someone else which is quite painful and that you certainly would not do if you didn’t want someone else’s happiness before your own. And yet, when you step out, they unfortantly come back in a negative way. You do every single thing you know how…you talk, you don’t talk, you don’t commenate, you listen, you are quite, you do things completely against your nature and the BAM, you are assumed to be doing all of the above for selfish reasons…what a paradox. The irony can be so overwhelming that you either laugh or you cry, but clearly either emotion is further misunderstood.
For someone who rarely cries, I feel like any event that would cause me to have that great of an emotional response would be cause for concern, not a red flag but at least cause to take pause….
Well, good news! today I stood up on water-skis, even if only for abit short time. I am grateful for my great coaching staff/peanut gallery’s advice bend knees/straight elbows…which devolved into stand up lean back but hunch forward. For a first time water-skiing event, I was assured by my coaches it was a success.
